To James, the selfish


M Sebert – Alone

you said you wouldn’t
but you let me choke

you said you couldn’t
but you went away

you said we shouldn’t
be friends again


a time to heal
you asked for

who’s gonna heal me
bleeding alone in the lawn

  1. nelle said:

    *hugs* You *will* heal yourself, and you *will* grow beyond any of his imaginings.

    In adversity, there is opportunity. You will find yours. From horrid circumstance, we find our measure. One can embrace it and stagnate, or dust off, move forward, and ascribe it to his loss.

    It hurts, and such words can sound harsh in the moment. Across months, as new experiences overlay old, we grow wise. Like an immune system, we gain the knowledge repeated circumstance cannot take us down… we made it through before.

    • Nanda said:

      I really like what you wrote, Nelle!
      I do believe it, deep in my heart. But right now that’s too far ahead. Now I’m just myself feel all the things I’m feeling right now – anger, despair, solitude, pity, relief… Everything mixed together. I’m sure I’ll get there, eventually. As you said, we did it before.

  2. I really love the negative woulda, coulda, shoulda, Nanda! It says so much by itself. Beautifully painful.

    • Nanda said:

      It does, doesn’t it?
      I think sometimes people cannot do what they intended to. And it’s not their fault, really. I see that. I just wished they could be more straight forward about it, recognize their flaws and not pretend to be so strong… If you know what I mean.

      • Especially, when few of us really are.

      • Nanda said:

        Indeed. I think the worse weakness it to try to appear strong…

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